Dumb Dumb Dupre

You gotta love it.

For those who have not heard, Ashley Alexandra Dupre, the infamous hooker behind the Spitzer affair, will not be getting any money from Girls Gone Wild's Joe Francis. He originally offered her $1MM to do a 2008 Spring Break Tour. However, after looking through his archives, he found all the footage he needed from her 18th birthday in Miami. Why buy the cow when you have the milk in your refridigerator?

I must say I am in 7th Heaven right now. She made it a point to have her face plastered all over the media in hope that she would make money off of this. But it backfired. Playboy won't give her anything...and now she can't even make money from Girls Gone Wild. Poor little thing. Let's not feel too bad for her though, there are reports that she made about $1MM a year for three years being a glorified hooker. I guess I am just in the wrong industry.

Now don't get me wrong, I know the girl grew up in a broken home and she claims that is the reason she has acted out but she is now 22 years old. At 22, everyone makes mistakes but they also should have morals and know right from wrong. Her identity was hidden when the Spitzer affair went public but she chose to get her 15 seconds of fame. I hope Dupre seeks counseling because one day she will wake up, all of her money spent, and will only have her memory left. That can be a cruel thing when it haunts you for decades. What if she actually decides to marry and have children? Her actions will now trickle into their lives.

Dupre, if you are reading this now...save yourself. Get out of this mess and come away with your dignity. Stop having sex for money, running around naked and be an adult. If you want a serious singing career or any career that does not require you to have sex for money, you need to work for it honey. Now that you are an adult, it is time to pick better role models.

Sometimes It's Just Life

The more I look around, the more I realize we are part of a society that takes pills to deal with life. It seems that one friend of mine cannot sleep so takes pills for that, another gets constant headaches, another keeps her vicodin around "just in case, the other is sick all the time. It makes me really think about how life was years ago when there weren't as many medicinal options as there are now. It appears people were even more happy back then, more peaceful, more relaxed. Why is that?

Have we become the society that is emotionally unstable? I think it is safe to say we are. Just recently I heard a report that there is traces of prozac and other prescriptions in our drinking water because so many pills are being manufactured and ending up in landfills or flushed down the toilets. This is truly alarming.

What I think people do not understand is that in many cases, the more pills you take, the more you need them. The easier it is for your body to forget what it's naturally supposed to do.

Now before you go thinking I am a Tom-Cruise-no-such-thing-as-ADD-no-need-for-pills wack-a-doo I will stop right here and tell you I am not. I truly believe there are more medical conditions now than there ever was but because of that, and the Internet, some people take advantage. Yes, I know, when a loved one passes away, the pain is sometimes unbearable and yes, when you have worked a long day and your eyes hurt so bad you want to cry it is easier to take a pill than to let your body deal with it. I get it. But what does that teach our youth and ourselves?

If I can offer one piece of advice, let it be this...before you go off and have your doctor write a prescription, take a look at your life and try to find the natural way to resolve the issue. If you can't sleep, maybe you are drinking too much caffeine. If your eyes hurt, maybe you should take a break from your computer and walk during lunch. I think it is beneficial for us to start listening to our bodies first. I am guilty of taking the easy way out but in the long run, I feel better if I cut out the things my body is rejecting.

This Spring, let's start taking our body and mind back. Let's make a conscious effort to put ourselves first and make lifestyle changes that will make us happy. Nobody can do this for us, we must do it for ourselves.

Good luck with life...I know yours will be a great one.

"Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being, and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity." ~World Health Organization, 1948

A Letter to Silda Spitzer

Dear Silda Spitzer,

I just want to start by saying that I am sorry you are going through such an emotional ordeal. I have no idea what your story is - i.e. how you met your husband, your first kiss, how he proposed and your wedding day. What I am sure of is that you did not deserve to be publically slapped in the face by your husband.

With that said, I have a few questions for you. First question is - HOW CAN YOU STAND NEXT TO YOUR MAN DURING ALL OF THIS SCANDAL? Your husband spent thousands of dollars "escorting" a 22-year-old hooker. How oh how can you pull herself to do that? Come on now, we are not in the 1950s and you are woman anything but a wall flower. You were a rising corporate lawyer and a strong public figure. YOU HAVE THREE DAUGHTERS!

Even if you decided to work on your marriage and in the end stay with him, I don't understand how one can stand in the public eye and say "This is my husband, I support him" after he humiliated you and your family. As I said, I can't even begin to imagine the feelings and hurt that you are feeling but at the end of the day, I can say that you must be strong. If not only for yourself, for your three daughters who are probably not much younger than the aspiring singer your husband was supporting. I am sure you do not want them to grow into large doormats as they marry in the future. Set an example for them and for the millions of women watching you stand beside your man, looking away at times with bags under your eyes.

Please know you will pull through this difficult time but I hope you come away with your strength and dignity. I am pulling for you and hope you will let your voice be heard. You do not need to slam any of the parties involved but I want to hear from you one day, when you are ready. Trust me, the women in this country will listen.

Warm regards,
Strong Working Women

Bitch is Back

For a woman, double standards are a way of life. I am sure you all agree. A woman has a one night stand - she is a slut. A man has a one night stand - he is just being "a man". A man is assertive, he is a good business man...a woman is assertive and she is a bitch. I am sure Hillary Clinton would thoroughly agree with me on this.

I have argued about Hillary Clinton at length with my dad. He says "she is cold, she comes off as a bitch" in which my response is "oh, because she is confident and strong willed in a man's world and industry?". To this I say with pride...Bitch is Back.

If in client meetings or with vendors I come off as "a bitch", I know I am doing a great job because I am arguing my point, getting stuff done and saving money. To this and to all of the other women I encounter like this I say - BRAVO! Don't be ashamed to be "the bitch", I am not saying you should walk around the office like your poop smells like roses but have a little faith in yourself and see what doors will open for you. Nobody wants a flim-flammer, jellyfish working for them, trust me. When you are in a position to work with vendors, if they smell blood, they will attack. Stay confident and strong and don't ever let them smell blood.

Keep truckin' ladies. Keep your head up.

With love, from one proud "bitch" to another.

Secret Life of a Brain Dead Dad...and Mom

One of my guilty pleasures (next to a stiff cosmo) is watching the TLC network. I can easily get swept up in any "Trading Spaces", "10 Years Younger", "Dr. G Medical Examiner"...you name it. Last night I caught an episode of "Secret Life of a Soccer Mom". Tracy Gold was the host and I was happy to see that she has gained some weight and is likely over her "issues". Anywho, in this show, they take a Soccer Mom and remove her from her stay-at-home mom duties and place her in the working world. In this episode, the mom went to school for fashion design and worked in the industry but stopped once she had her kids.

Long story short, she does a great job when they put her back in the working world for a week and even creates a dress that is worn by Jennifer Hudson. Fabulous.

Now for my issue. In the show, while the mom was at work for the week, the dad had to stay home with this kids. This man infuriated me beyond belief. It was like he never interacted with a child in his life! He let them walk around and make a mess of the whole house and at one point, they were EATING DIAPER RASH CREAM! How, oh how, could a mother let a dad get away with not being a responsible parent for this long? Her oldest daughter was about 8 years old and was a better parent than her father!

In this case I must blame this mother for the lack of parenting skills her husband has. If you teach your husband from day one that you will do everything for the kids and show that you do not "trust" him to "baby-sit", he will cater to this thought and will let you do everything. HELLOOOO, WOMEN, DON'T DO THIS TO YOURSELF! From day one, my husband never knew what it was like to have all of the chores done and dinner on the table when he walked in. That is because I work full time and in our house, it is equal opportunity s**t work. I can tell you it will also be this way when we have kids. Please trust me on this one...it will help your marriage and help you to be a better parent if you work as a team. That means, each person does an equal part in everything.

If you say that this does not matter much to you, I believe it is worth it to show equality to your kids because in the world outside of your home, times are a-changing. Keep up or be pushed around.

Clothes Make the Man...and Woman

I am a firm believer that if you want a specific role in life and in the workplace...you must first dress the part. It doesn't take a lot of money or a fashion consultant to tell you that wearing sweatpants on Casual Fridays is a big no-no.

The reason I bring up this topic is because I was at a client meeting last week and noticed all kinds of clothing gone wrong. From over-stretched to just plain inappropriate. I understand that the receptionist does not earn what a VP does and should not be expected to come in wearing designer suits but for the love of God, would it kill her to throw together some dress pants and decent shoes? We were in the midst of a meeting and in walks the assistant to the CEO wearing cut-off shorts and a tee-shirt! No, I am not kidding you. My eyes almost bugged out of my head. Does she think she will ever be promoted from an Assistant if she is dressing like that?

Ever since Old Navy and even Target entered our lives, there is no reason for sloppy dressers in the workplace. You can get a nice Isaac Mizrahi outfit for under $50. Can't beat that with a bat.

So, if I can offer another piece of advice. Take a look in your closet, ladies. More importantly, ask a boyfriend/husband/friend what they think of your style and work attire. You may be surprised. I am very lucky that my husband has an eye for fashion. He is a sharp dresser and helps me along too. Trust me that when you look good, you feel good and your confidence will be overwhelming to all you encounter.

Happy Shopping!