When Not to be "Jabber Jaws"

I must say that I am guilty of doing this myself. I have gotten better over the years but I still make the same mistake time and time again.

What mistake you ask?

Well, I have the habit of complaining about my husband to my sister...and my sister to my husband, when either of them piss me off. The reason this is such a big deal is because I feel that when I show anger toward one of them, the other is quick is run to my defense, agree with me and deep down will hold it against that person even though I am well over the issue.

I must admit I have been on the other side of this spectacule too. When a friend of mine will complain about her hubby, I must admit that the next time I see that girl's hubby, I think of the issue she told me about...I don't say anything...but think about it.

So I ask, is it better to let it out or keep it in?

Let's start with option #1, we let it out. Now our sisters and friends will no doubt look at our hubby's differently (depending on the dirt). They will give their opinion and make judgements and let's face it, at the end of the day, they will talk about the situation to other people. Definitely a negative.

Option #2, we keep it in. Now we play and replay the issue in our mind and it makes us nuts, or we just get over the issue.

I think we have a clear winner. Option #2. Now I just need to practice what I preach. Easier said than done. Do you have experiences with this issue? Do you let it out or hold it in...or do you have people in your life that can really keep their mouth shut??

The Art of Negotiating

I have met many women in my day that will argue that MAC make-up is wayyy better than Lancome or that their gym is the best in the city...but when it comes to their finances, they let a great argument pass them by. I feel that we, women, do not argue nearly enough about the important things in our lives and it is costing us big bucks.

Here's an example, did you know that if you are a good credit card customer (i.e. make payments on time, use the card now and again, had the card for many years) you can call and argue that you get a lower APR? I do it every six months or so and they always have lowered my APR by something. If you had a card since college and are now in your mid-twenties and have a better job but keep a minimum balance...why should you pay the college kid rate of 20% APR? Give them a call and tell them you want a lower rate or you will cancel the card or transfer the balance.

Second example, when you get a raise, unless it blows your socks off, there is no harm in asking for more...or asking for some other perk (extra week of vacation, better desk location, etc). I have never heard of anyone being fired for asking for more money...or not been hired after being made an offer because they asked for more money. The worst they can say is "No".

Now when it comes to the big things in life, I will put up an argument - buying a house, car, salary, credit cards. However, I think there is room outside of this area - furniture stores, apartment rent, cell phones, electronics.

I think it should be our first priority to argue like it's make-up and let's save some money this year. You with me? I am sure it will be embarrassing at some times but let's remember, they can only say no.